My Dog Scamp

I am involved in a lot of money-making schemes and homeworking on the internet at the moment, and came upon some poetry competitions. In one you could win £30 for a poem about your pet. It's a bit of a long shot, but worth a try. This is a poem based on Christopher Smart's poem 'My Cat Geoffry' and is written in the same style, but sadly isn't very poetic. It starts off quite poetic but then gets silly in the middle. The last line is in the style of Smart too (I thought it needed a bit of explanation as it sort of comes from nowhere).

My Dog Scamp

I will consider my dog Scamp

For he is a servant of the Living God duly and daily serving him

For he worships God in his own way

For he the first time he saw a bird in the sky

He froze and marvelled at its wonder

For God has blessed him with acute facilities

For he can find a ball in a cornfield

And he has a beard and fringe as scruffy as an unmade bed

Thereupon on occasions he has the appearance of only having one eye

For his eyes are bright and vulpine

But in head of a small furry housetrained vulpine

For he patrols the garden for the cats

For the sneaky felines wind him up through the glass door

So that he departs the back door as a coiled spring

For he can scale a high fence

For this must result from a turbo-charged adrenaline surge

And we are informed of his extra-curricular activities by neighbours ringing the doorbell

Firstly he checks under birdtables for peanuts

Secondly he checks in hedges for cats

Thirdly he checks in the gardens he passes for cats

For he has a cat obsession

But the only time he ever got close to the arched hissing enemy he backed away swiftly

For on the walk to the corner shop he prances with tail erect like a king on his progress

For he is frightened of Jack Russells

But he likes running rings round Alsatians

For he outmanoeurves them by weaving to and fro

For he is supremely proud of this skill

And exercises it whenever possible

But tucks in his behind just for safety's sake

For he is a godly creature