I am involved in a lot of money-making schemes and homeworking on the internet at the moment, and came upon some poetry competitions. In one you could win £30 for a poem about your pet. It's a bit of a long shot, but worth a try. This is a poem based on Christopher Smart's poem 'My Cat Geoffry' and is written in the same style, but sadly isn't very poetic. It starts off quite poetic but then gets silly in the middle. The last line is in the style of Smart too (I thought it needed a bit of explanation as it sort of comes from nowhere).
My Dog Scamp
I will consider my dog Scamp
For he is a servant of the Living God duly and daily serving him
For he worships God in his own way
For he the first time he saw a bird in the sky
He froze and marvelled at its wonder
For God has blessed him with acute facilities
For he can find a ball in a cornfield
And he has a beard and fringe as scruffy as an unmade bed
Thereupon on occasions he has the appearance of only having one eye
For his eyes are bright and vulpine
But in head of a small furry housetrained vulpine
For he patrols the garden for the cats
For the sneaky felines wind him up through the glass door
So that he departs the back door as a coiled spring
For he can scale a high fence
For this must result from a turbo-charged adrenaline surge
And we are informed of his extra-curricular activities by neighbours ringing the doorbell
Firstly he checks under birdtables for peanuts
Secondly he checks in hedges for cats
Thirdly he checks in the gardens he passes for cats
For he has a cat obsession
But the only time he ever got close to the arched hissing enemy he backed away swiftly
For on the walk to the corner shop he prances with tail erect like a king on his progress
For he is frightened of Jack Russells
But he likes running rings round Alsatians
For he outmanoeurves them by weaving to and fro
For he is supremely proud of this skill
And exercises it whenever possible
But tucks in his behind just for safety's sake
For he is a godly creature